Just something new I’m trying out. Enjoy!

Dexter Byrd stared out the window of his parents’ beat-up Toyota Corolla, the pounding of 2000s rock music blaring in his headphones. Gazing out at the desolate cornfields of middle-of-nowhere Ohio, he thought, this is the American dream. The setting was boring, but Dexter was anything but bored on the ride to his freshman year of college. He knew he would be playing third base for a Division III baseball team and going for an English major, but otherwise, he had no idea what to expect.

Anxiety continued to set in as Dexter saw that they were entering campus. A drab-looking sign read: “Richard J. Haggerty University – Educating America’s Youth Since 1991.” Tall gray academic buildings were upon them and fellow students walked the streets, all seeming so much cooler and more confident than him. 

Suddenly, he saw his mother gesturing at him to take off his headphones. “Honey, we’re here!” she exclaimed. Dexter got out of the car, grabbed his bags, and gazed around at the dorm buildings that now surrounded him. This was his new home, whether he liked it or not.

“Alright, thanks for driving me, guys,” he said to his parents.

“Of course, sweetie,” his mother replied. Pointing to a nearby building, she said, “The student center is over there, let’s go get you some supplies.”

“Sure, if you want to, I guess,” Dexter agreed. 

When they entered the building, the dull aesthetic of the campus suddenly changed. It was alive with bustling students, and Dexter felt like an alien trying to assimilate to human society. Tucked away into the back corner, the name of a store read “Cold Subject” in neon letters. The store was mostly black on the inside, but its walls were lined with brightly-colored merchandise. It was the coolest-looking school supply store Dexter had ever seen.

“Oh boy, that store looks pretty groovy, doesn’t it?” Dexter’s father observed. “You’d sure be one of the cool cats to be seen in there.”

“You’re such a boomer,” Dexter replied, rolling his eyes. “But yeah, it looks cool. Let’s do it.” Dexter and his parents made their way into the Cold Subject.

Entering the store, the first thing Dexter noticed was the school merchandise on the shelves. He had been under the impression that most colleges didn’t have cool merch, but this was a place that could actually inspire school spirit. The words “Haggerty Flying Hamsters” adorned almost every hoodie, T-shirt, and water bottle in the place, and the visuals were creative and different. Many variations of the aggressive rodent mascot were displayed, all portraying unique fight scenes between the hamster and the competition. In one of them, the hamster even donned a spiky black wig and sunglasses.

Even with all the badass merchandise surrounding him, Dexter’s eyes were particularly drawn to the back corner of the store, which was completely unexpected. A small area was lined with CDs, posters, and T-shirts of his favorite rock bands, including Rise In Girl, Red Knight, Longfellow Falls, and more. It was small, but it was the emo paradise of his dreams. Suddenly, he heard a voice. “Hey, I see you checkin’ out that emo shit, huh?” Dexter turned around. A tall black guy with dreads was standing behind him, wearing a Fighting Hamsters baseball jacket.

“Sir, can you watch your language?” Dexter heard his mom ask.

“No, Mom, calm down,” Dexter said. “Yeah man, that’s my shit,” he said to the guy. 

“Hell yeah bro, you gonna fit in good around here,” the guy responded. “We got hella scene kids, even on the baseball team.” He paused. “Hey, aren’t you one of the new freshies coming in?”

“Uh, yeah…I mean, yessir!” Dexter chirped enthusiastically. 

“Now, what is this freshie business?” Dad asked.

“And what do you mean by scene kids? Like a scene in a play?” Mom inquired.

“I think they’re theater enthusiasts,” Dad explained. “Well, it’s good to see such a well-rounded group of young men playing baseball together.”

“Oh yeah, we well-rounded all right,” the guy said. “Just not in the way you think. My name’s Dazzy, by the way.” Dazzy dapped Dexter up.

“What’s up, man? I’m Dexter!”

“Dexter, my dude, we gonna have a good-ass time on this team. Get hyped!”

“Let’s do it, baby!”

“Alright, I’ll see you around, man.” Dazzy walked out of the shop.

Dad put his hand on Dexter’s shoulder. “Well, I can’t say I understand all of the millennial lingo, but he seems like a nice young gentleman. Aside from the profanity, of course.” Fuck yeah he does, Dexter thought.