It was Friday night, and the gang sat in Johnson C basement, drinking White Claws and smoking Dazzy\u2019s bong. The Flying Hamsters\u2019 season opener was set for Sunday, at home against Easterville State University. At a time when they should have been excited, the group felt lackadaisical and uninspired.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cMan, is it just me, or is everything kinda whack right now?\u201d Dazzy observed. \u201cSome kind of negative shit\u2019s been in the air lately.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know, man, but this situation with Scarlett is getting out of control,\u201d Lewis said. \u201cThe makeup sex today was great, but I feel like I\u2019m walking on eggshells on top of a nuclear bomb.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what Dazzy\u2019s gonna be walking on too, if he\u2019s not careful,\u201d Kat replied. She shot Dazzy a look, and he returned it. The tension could be cut with a knife.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh please, all of y\u2019all with your baby mama drama,\u201d Bobby complained. \u201cI\u2019m out here getting physically assaulted, and Coach ain\u2019t gonna do shit about it. Just gonna play that creep because of nepotism and intimidation. My back is killing me.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYeah, Ronnie\u2019s cool, man, but I don\u2019t get that about him,\u201d Dazzy said. \u201cAnd I think Fender knew what he was doing there. He saw you coming for his spot. It\u2019s fucked up.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAlso fucked up is the way Dexter\u2019s been acting lately,\u201d Lewis chimed in. Dexter had been silent and brooding. He snapped out of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHey man, I\u2019ve just been in my feels,\u201d he said defensively. \u201cBut fuck that! We\u2019re gonna step up and start making positive changes.\u201d He downed the rest of his White Claw and slammed it to the floor in a sudden burst of inspiration. Criticism fueled his fire.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHey, good for you, man!\u201d Bobby praised him. \u201cAbout damn time.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBruh, I don\u2019t know, we just need something to shake things up and get us back on track,\u201d Kat said. \u201cWe all seem to be spiraling out here.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The room went silent, and Dazzy\u2019s face was thoughtful. Suddenly, he started wagging his finger, indicating he had an idea. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI got it, y\u2019all,\u201d he declared calmly. \u201cTanner said he had some acid tabs in today.\u201d Tanner Jacobs was the team\u2019s colorful center fielder. \u201cWhat are y\u2019all up to tomorrow?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cUh, resting up for the most important game of my life so far?\u201d Lewis offered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYeah bro, I don\u2019t know,\u201d Bobby said. \u201cI\u2019ve always wanted to try it, but that shit sounds risky before Opening Day.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cDazzy, have you lost your damn mind?\u201d Kat inquired, dumbfounded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHey, listen, though,\u201d Dazzy began to explain. \u201cWe have all day to rest our bodies for the game. There\u2019s nothing better we can do for our minds during that rest time than to trip. It\u2019ll be one day, it\u2019ll wear off by the next morning, and it\u2019ll get our heads right. Sometimes you gotta take risks and think outside the box.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBut what does it do, though?\u201d Dexter asked. \u201cI\u2019ve always been scared that if I try anything stronger than weed, I\u2019ll end up strung out on crack, heroin, and meth.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe D.A.R.E. program will do that to you, bro,\u201d Lewis observed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt won\u2019t do any of that shit, man,\u201d Dazzy assured him. \u201cIt opens up your mind to be free. My boys, the Art Gallery Villains, made their entire second album while tripping on a beach in the Dominican, and that shit was genius.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWell, just because it worked for geniuses doesn\u2019t mean it\u2019ll work for us,\u201d Bobby argued. \u201cWe\u2019re just a bunch of regular-ass college kids.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s the beauty of it, man,\u201d Dazzy said. \u201cListen, I\u2019ll get up early and get the shit from Tanner. We all meet up back here. We pop a tab, or a half-tab for the beginners. We come back here, we throw on some content, and we have the time of our lives.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cBut what if we\u2019re still fucked up tomorrow though?\u201d Dexter asked. \u201cDoesn\u2019t it last a long time?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll be good by tomorrow,\u201d Dazzy assured. \u201cAlso, have y\u2019all ever heard of Dock Ellis?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSome old dude from like the \u201870s or something?\u201d Lewis guessed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat the hell kind of doctor is this?\u201d Kat asked indignantly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYO,\u201d Dazzy said in disbelief. \u201cWe gotta watch some content on him. My dude threw a literal motherfucking NO-HITTER while tripping on acid.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhoa.\u201d Dexter\u2019s jaw dropped. \u201cDeadass?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI shit you not.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou know what, fuck it,\u201d Bobby said. \u201cI want to be spontaneous and have adventures. I want to be like Dock. I\u2019m in.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOk, I\u2019m going to make the executive decision to live life to the fullest,\u201d Lewis said. \u201cI\u2019m in.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh my god, y\u2019all are crazy,\u201d Kat said. \u201cBut you guys need to have a caretaker, so I\u2019m gonna come and experience the chaos.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s why you\u2019re my baby,\u201d Dazzy told her. \u201cBig bet, boys. Let\u2019s do this. Time to be based on the baseball field!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It was Friday night, and the gang sat in Johnson C basement, drinking White Claws and smoking Dazzy\u2019s bong. The Flying Hamsters\u2019 season opener was set for Sunday, at home against Easterville State University. At a time when they should have been excited, the group felt lackadaisical and uninspired. \u201cMan, is it just me, or […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","WB4WB4WP_MODE":"","WB4WP_PAGE_SCRIPTS":"","WB4WP_PAGE_STYLES":"","WB4WP_PAGE_FONTS":"","WB4WP_PAGE_HEADER":"","WB4WP_PAGE_FOOTER":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[7,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-347","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ootb","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\n